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Inside this Issue
Sex Tape Confused For Hostage Tape Defective Chinese Chemistry Kit Filled With Chemicals Man Wonders Why His Co-Co Puffs Breakfast Looks Nothing Like The One On TV Ahmadinejad: "I Thought You Meant Happy People" Joker "Really not that Funny," Gotham Citizen Claims Big Jew Won't Admit Sunday Is The Sabbath From The Archives
This is For You Grandpa - an Editorial by Bryan Haut: My grandfather is a nice, Jewish gentleman of 85. He wears white shoes, a white belt, and can bowl in the 200's. Life is good for grandpa, but he keeps asking me to mail him an issue of Satire V Read More Featured Personal Ad
Seeking: One-fucking-sixth of the faculty. Is that so much to ask? Quorum@fas.harvard.edu |
Local
Area Man Says The Word ‘Movie’ Funny
An enterprising group of young adults discovered that one among them says the word ‘movie’ in a totally hilarious way.
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Local Man Isn’t Sure How to Get into The Olympics, But Will Give it a Shot Anyway
Notorious Wife Beater to Starbucks: “You Call This Shit Coffee?”
Twinkie Defense Pretty Much Explains Area Man’s Entire Life
After many years of fumbling to find an excuse for his ineffectual life, John Stottard has struck gold.
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Area Mom Wants You to Try Her Banana Bread
Dad Resigns from Position to Take Job with Secretary
There is going to be more food to share these holidays, following the abrupt announcement of your father, who has since tendered his paternal resignation and will take a new job with his secretary.
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Squirrels Bury Human Skull Next to Chestnuts
Santa Unable to Bring Back Daddy
Molly O’Monahan, a mean eight years old, didn’t want the new Hannah Montana Young Ladies Bra for Christmas this year. She didn’t want Guitar Hero 27. She didn’t even want a pony. She just wanted to get her recently divorced father back. Santa has been unable to deliver.
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How to Protect Your Home From: BURGLARS
Local Diwali Celebration Devolves into Rosh Hashanah
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